Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Odds and Ends

Well, here I am......at least most of me, or perhaps that should be some of me............I think I dissolved or decontructed during the various BD celebrations and the strain of  my siege with the Driving Test  to get my License renewed.   Since then I have been lolling about in reclining chairs gasping quietly waiting for feeling to return to my limbs and clear thought to my brain..........I fear my memory is beginning to get a bit frayed around the edges...........(I spent two days last week trying to remember the name of the tree with the lavender flowers that blooms in June and finally came up with Jacaranda....I didn't even know how to Google that one).  I am periodically overcome with the terror of approaching Alzheimer's and have taken to making lists of my lists......but that is another story.
 
Anyway I had made a few notes of questions you had asked in your comments and that I had not yet answered and figure that might not tax my poor limp brain too much, so here goes:

Cathy of  "Still Waters" wanted to know, after my miraculous Magic Johnson BD encounter, what I would do for an encore next BD.....and that one is easy.......just make sure I am around for the next one.

Maybelline of "Maybelline's Gardens" whose sharp mind has a tendency to slide dangerously near to the line of demarcation between good clean fun and soft porn asked whether, in the photo of Nina, me and Magic Johnson,  I am invisibly clutching, patting or stroking Magic's butt........no, believe it or not my arm is around his waist where I did detect a tiny bit of a love handle on that magnificent bod.  If I had had all of my wits about me, which I didn't, I might have surreptitiously stroked that wonderful backside, but, woe is me, I didn't think of it.

And speaking of butts, Bobbie of "Cottleston Pie"  referred to my comment about the Mark Harmon movie that had a beautiful scene in which the Gorgeous Man is shown totally nekkid from the rear.  She asked me to reveal the title saying, "Inquiring minds want to know".   I will happily tell you that it is called "Fourth Story" and co-stars Mimi Rogers.  It is definitely not the best of Mark's movies........for one thing he plays a bumbling, nerdy Private Detective with horn rimmed glasses which he is always misplacing......a part you cannot imagine Mark Harmon in unless you see it with your own eyes.  I swear I believe he modeled the character after Woody Allen (whom I adore, but not in the same sentence or genre with Mark Harmon....it was definitely a character he had trouble getting into).  However, he does fall out of character a few times and it is worth watching just for the scene in which a noise makes him rise out of Mimi's bed (having finally shed some of his nerdiness) and he walks stealthily through the apartment sans any garments whatsoever. Beautiful back view from head to toe.

I am ashamed to say I do not remember who asked me which restaurants I celebrated in during my 2 day BD extrvaganza, but for any of you who plan to be passing through North Hollywood and Studio City I will gladly reveal that the site of my encounter with Magic was a wonderful Italian restaurant at Laurel and Ventura called "Louise's  (if you go do order and share the appetizer "Grilled Portabello Mushroom stuffed with Cheese and Spinach.  And the source of those mussels in broth and the incredible profiterole was the "Outtake Bistro" just as half a block east on Ventura.  I can definitely recommend both of them without shame and also wish to mention that their prices are amazingly reasonable.....(Hell, you all know how cheap I am but I demand both quality and reasonable prices).


And finally, I must clarify the subject of the California Driving Test for License renewals.  It is only half blind folks like me who are subjected to this torture every year or two, and in all fairness....how can you blame them?   My neighbor who is a year older than I am but who can pass the vision test with both eyes just had her license renewed for  5 years without having to take the driving test, only the written test and the eye test.
The Inspectors who administer the Driving Test are Devils who manage to find 21 mistakes you make even when you think you did everything perfectly.  It is impossible to guess what they are going to chew you out about so all you can do is pray that they do not find 22 mistakes and fail you.  As for the maniacs out there on the streets who are determined to kill or maim you and wouldn't know a correct driving procedure if it bit them on the ass, they don't have to take any damned driving test from first license until they reach the age of 70.....their renewed licenses are mailed to them automatically prior to their expiration.

The moral of that story is that, of the gazillion drivers who are licensed to drive in Los Angeles, half of them are in their dotage  and are half blind, they know how to drive well but are physically unable to do so for one reason or another......the other half are younger people who have forgotten every good driving rule or choose to simply ignore them all while they drive, chat, text, apply mascara, eat subway sandwiches, move wildly to the beat of their blasting stereos, or simply drive with their heads turned backward while they scream endlessly at their kids in the back seat and rarely cast an eye to the front at all.

When you think about it, it is a bloody miracle anyone in California who sets foot in a car survives to do it again another day.......