Sunday, September 22, 2013

Holy Crap......Is That What I Said????

 Well folks, the time has finally come for me to try that damned Dragon program again whereby I dictate my thoughts and the computer prints them out… Hopefully.  And  pigs will someday fly.
I have no idea how this is all going to come out… I plan to leave any funny bits for your amusement… That is, if there are any funny bits. All we can do is hope.

Sadly, the damned program has forgotten all the dirty words I taught it last time. In fact, as I recall, one of the reasons I got disgusted and gave up on this Thing was because each time I taught it a naughty word and it finally got it right, it promptly forgot in the next session everything it had learned at the last lesson.  A person could lose faith in technology very quickly, I can tell you. After teaching it."SHITPISSFUCK" a dozen or more times and having it forget it A dozen or more times . My rent level… Whoops There it goes taking off on its own and making arbitrary decisions about what I said when it doesn't have a clue. What that should have been was rant level, but it's easy to understand why it thought I said rent. So I'll forgive it for now. I don't know why, incidentally, it keeps shoving in capital letters where they don't belong, but I'll figure that out later. OY.

I think what I was going to say a few sentences back was something about my getting ready to begin ranting at the least provocation. And heaven knows, there will be a lot of them no doubt......provocations, that is.... I must admit that it's doing pretty well so far. Of course, I have had to make a number of corrections along the way and I I had to type" ship this fall. Ships up up up up up up up… The whooPS… There it goes again… I did not, under any circumstances utter the words ." Ship this fall." And the up up up stuff is how it interprets my laugh. Whenever I try to get it to say ,"shitpissfuck" it insists on trying to ship something. I haven't tried yet today to go to the option of teaching it new words, I do not have the will or the energy to attempt that project right now.….Maybe later.

Just for spite. I notice that this infernal program is trying its best to frustrate me it in a different way today….When it does screw up, it isn't doing it in its usual laugh provoking manner… Oh you devious piece of software….I may just have to start uttering my handful of year dish phrases… No, no, no….That was supposed to be Yiddish phrases….Well, I think you get the idea. Anyway, I intend to persevere and get this thing whipped into shape or my name ain't…… Now what was my name…… It was right here on the tip of my tongue A minute ago.

Hell and dam no no no….Not that kind… Damn… Yes that's right… Hell and damn, I am sorry I couldn't provide you with some belly laughs. Perhaps next time I can make the thinygram no no not  him oh shipped up up up up up....... misbehave in a more entertaining fashion. There, that's better.  Today I am simply experimenting to see what I can get out of it. The truth is if I can get this working in a fairly acceptable manner it will make it so much easier for me to communicate via the computer. You guys will have to bear with me while I try to get it going properly. Wish me well.  Sigh!


....... ship  Ships up up up up up up up… The whooPS… There it goes again…   Sigh!  Oy.

Now if you were expecting any news, updates, revelations, or confessions you are just shit out of luck. I am totally overjoyed to report that there have been no new crises, disasters, or general fuck ups. (Of course, I typed in  that last word manuallyschooling forgods sake whaty    ooops, sorry…… This program does not know the word fuck ups…just the deed......Ha… Hopefully in time it will!


  1. Reminds me of typing "hand woven" in the old days. Word blew "woven" right up with red squiggly underlines. "Hand ovens" it screamed. Your stuff is Hand Ovens. So there.

  2. I agree with Joanne. Hand Ovens rule. And ships, of every kind. I am a strong supporter of General Fuckups, never lost a war... And Lo-LOLS.

  3. You can conquer this demon, Lo ~ I have faith in you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hugs ~

  4. Just remove the filter from that app.

  5. I myself typed in the word fuck-up today. Or is that two words? Whatever.
    I love you, Lo.

  6. Ah Ship! up up up up. You rock!

  7. The programme is malfucktioning -- obviously!

  8. My goodness. Even software is insisting we be "PC" and polite...

    Dumb software.

  9. What do you mean, you couldn't provide belly laughs today? At the very least, you gave me some chuckles amid the ship up up up up year dish phrases. Hang in there, Lo!