I have, for the moment, ceased to worry about being addicted to Blogsville. It appears to be a relatively harmless addiction and, it IS free so I am just going to accept it's presence in my life with gratitude and let it be. Then again, I have been eavesdropping on some of my private thoughts lately and perhaps I really should be worried. Like, for instance...........
Sometimes it seems to me that relating to people in the real world is sort of like Facebook or maybe Twitter or a cocktail party.........lots of people...you brush against them and talk briefly to a few or to many.....you mouth meaningless trivia....usually 50 words or less.......you keep moving and circulating....... if it is a cocktail party, you keep drinking till you are so blotto that nothing matters or hurts any more and you "friend" everyone (even people you normally loathe and wouldn't be caught dead with) and, worst of all, you think you are having a good time.
Though you are dealing with real people you are really not plugged into anyone unless you happen to make a soused connection with someone of the opposite sex that you are inspired to take home with you for the night.....otherwise your connections mostly feel superficial, feel like dust and taste like cardboard.
On the other hand, sharing thoughts in the blog world can be more like sharing a fabulous cup of home brewed French Roast coffee and an apple streudel (sp?) with a dear friend while you both lean toward each other giggling, nodding and lounging at your kitchen table. You listen to what the other person has to say and they listen to you, and you make real contact and feel that your inner self has been touched. You are warmed and nourished...... and....satisfied.......and amazingly, 10,000 people (or in my case 141) can all be having the same or a similar experience at the same moment. Awesome.
I am not saying that you don't or can't have pleasurable experiences with real people in the real world.....just that they are very different experiences and the more I think about it the more I feel that I, for one, really need both kinds in my life.
I wonder, is it only misogynous old hermits like me who feel this way, or do you more normal (?) social, gregarious types ever feel this way too?
I would really love to hear your thoughts on this........I think.
Looking west at sunrise, late October
1 hour ago
I love this post. I can identify with the "kitchen table" thing. I have nevr been one to go visit other people,,I never had to. My kitchen table has always been like a magnet, it seems. Coffee was always ready, and I can't count the people that have sat at it over the years,,,Laughter, tears,serious discussins, silly antics, whatever. I wouldn't trade those "contiuing" times for anything. Your blog has me remembering some very happy times in my kitchen, so I thank you dear, Now I will sit here and remember those times,,It's nice...Love, Ida
ReplyDeleteG'day. As Anonymous said I too don't have to go out and visit a great deal, though sometimes I do to be fair to my friends, but for some reason people seem to gravitate to us here. Maybe it's the location where we live, the countryside, the scenery, maybe it's just our friendship or a combination of all of these.In the blog world you can let it all hang out and maybe that's what a lot of people relate to. Anyway, whatever it is, it seems to work. Really enjoy your blog. Take care. Liz...
ReplyDeleteTrust me, you are not alone in this. Blog family is family, people i pray for, cry with when bad things happen, rejoice with for the good in their lives. Just like the people i see face to face every day.
ReplyDeleteBeing a misogynous old hermit myself, I have no idea what "normal" people would think but I think you have put it exactly right. For me, at least.
ReplyDeleteI love sharing coffee with you.
Most times, I enjoy my online friends much better than my real life ones...
ReplyDeleteAnother misogynous old hermit...
Interestingly enough, I feel exactly the same way. Sometimes too much.
ReplyDeleteWhen someone "drops" me or stops reading my blog...it hurts as much as someone I *actually* know spurning me. I wish I didn't care so much, because, really, it shouldn't!
As I get older, the friends I want to have around me in real life are the ones that are the "old" friends...the ones I have a history with.
On the other hand, my blog friends are all new...but there seems to be a level of intimacy with what is revealed in their blogs that puts the friendship on a whole other level that is more than the casual relationships out there.
You can have both! :)
Love your blog!
The best analysis I have heard describes online communication as "frictionless." This is both good and bad. On the one hand, we can all lend our voices to a friend in need easily, on the Internet. On the other hand, this does mean that those in real life who help us are having to work harder, and in some ways the relationship is forged in a hotter fire.
ReplyDeleteI love my blog, and reading others. I really value my online relationships. But I do try to remember that I live and die in the real world, and I have to make sure the network exists there too.
Heck no, Lo. You are not alone in your thoughts. I always thought of it as a more convenient cracker barrel to chew the fat over. It is interesting though when a reader puts a different tone to something that gets posted. Sometimes things can spin out of control for a bit. But so what? I still think this is a super way to communicate.
ReplyDeletePS Lo: I am addicted to ancestry.com. Flippin' fantastic.
ReplyDeleteDear Lo,
ReplyDeleteI love your blog and I totally relate to your idea of the different kinds of friendships. I can no longer do the cocktail parties and hangovers so I choose to stick to myself and a few friends I can have around the kitchen table, although I must say that Minnesota can be a cool and aloof place sometime. I think blogs can open the door to more honest communication and offer a shared experience I can't often find out here in the "real world."