Wednesday, December 25, 2013

You Say You Want Dragon.....OK, I'll Give You Dragon

I want you to know that I appreciate your suggestions to help me overcome my vision problems, especially in relation to the blog. I'm not going to chastise you for forgetting my very funny blog written about a year ago with the assistance (that's a joke) of the Dragon software.  I would repost it or refer you back to it if I had any idea when it was posted...but, never mind.  We can somehow proceed without it.

Listen you guys, if you haven't learned anything else about me you surely must know that I am a prodigious, fantastic problem solver. Why else would I have been the one out of the whole Information Services Dept. who they  called in the middle of the night to come in and fix computer programs that always broke down when everybody was asleep?   With my convoluted brain and some duct tape I can usually find a way to fix things or develop a useful substitue solution.....well, I said "USUALLY".

When I first heard about the Dragon program I was dancing on the ceiling with optimism. I wish you were not know that's not right…oooops,  Let's try that again. I was sure ........(that's better) that the   Dragon program would be my solution and I spent many, many Mary hours. No that Noto no no no… That should have been and that he on our why. note .........nope, we're still not there. Perhaps I had better give up trying to use Merry and say hilarious hours trying to dicta now the deer te a blog. Oh, dear.  See, the problem is that my vocabulary is a little larger and perhaps more obscene than that of the dragon's.  Also, my diction is not always perfect.  Some words it gets just fine, and others not so good.  But let us stagger on with this experiment. 

The Dragon program is quite remarkable.  You can actually teach it words it doesn't know.  Trouble is, like an Alzheimer's patient, it has very short, short term memory.  It forgets very quickly and you are back to square one.  I think I told you about the time I tried to teach it my favorite expletive…shitpissfuck… And after about 10 tries, by George H gooGod it wilts whoops… I think we are off the track again, all though I think we could use God's help about now,  Maybe right now.  I meant to say "by George, it's got it".  The next day, however, it had forgotten the lesson completely......very disheartening.  The problem is, I can barely see to place the cursor in the right spot to make corrections manually, either of Dragon or of my own errors, so it is a bit of  a struggle.

I do not plan to give up!  I do plan to go back to working with Dragon to see if I can learn how to teach it to remember words I have just taught it.  Hell, I may even spring for th most current version to see if they have improved the program since I bought it.  Meanwhile, pull on your girdles and buckle up your safety may be a bumpy ride.

Much love to all of you and happy holidays.  May we all have a   healthy, peaceful, shitpissfuck-free 2014.  (Last sentence written by a human..... with slight Dragon tendencies.)