Wednesday, October 6, 2010

The Sky Is Falling....or Has the Roof Just Fallen In ?

Well, the dreaded thing has of my devoted followers  (Betsy) has abandoned polite patience and has burst out with direct demands that I reactivate the ol' blogging machine.  She didn't exactly say "or  else" but it was implied and I, being a devout coward about abandonment, am scrambling to find the right button to there one labelled "Resume Blogging"?  ......oh damn, why are there so many buttons on this thing and none of them have identifying labels?

Oh, sorry....... THAT machine is the new mobile phone I just purchased, which has visible numbers, tenks gott, but the letters that go with them are so tiny that I need my strongest magnifier to even see that they exist,  not to mention needing  my page magnifier to read the instruction booklet which, in my opinion, is just like all the technical manuals I encountered during my computer career.  In order to understand what the manual is telling you to do you must already know how to do what you are asking it how to do.

How in the hell do those kids text so rapidly when I have been practicing for hours to memorize which letters go with which digits and have only been able to enter about 4 phone numbers and names into my Contacts List????   I,who used to pride myself on doing hexadecimal arithmetic (base 16) almost as fast as decimal (base 10), am totally defeated by a stupid gadget that 5 year olds are adept at using....while they are not even standing still, but walking around hopping up and down and/or dancing , no less............"what IS the world coming to?",.  I ask bleakly.  Obviously, I am not fit for it. Sob.

To put  into words  the most ridiculous understatement I can conjure up, this has not been my best week.  It began when I tried to access my old mobile phone account with ATT (as Shakespeare would say, "A pox on them!"  before he fainted dead away at what the world has turned into)  and was rebuffed unceremoniously with "incorrect password".  Since I was staring at my notes in my password book I see that I have entered the correct password......(yes, of course I have a password book.....doesn't everyone?    I mean....when I started out with my own computer I was warned about the advisability of using different passwords for different applications so that the  boogeymen wouldn't get me.  I know better now, but it is too late to change all of them to "abc123".....)

I next endeavored to simply retrieve my password from ATT.  That didn't work because 326 tries resulted only in several holes in the wall nearest my head.  Each time I came close to being able to read the password they were revealing to me on my phone screen the screen went black and I failed miserably at this so called simple process.  Next, several hours were spent on the phone with  both robotic and live calling partners in various departments of ATT, punching in interminable lists of numbers and choices for both robotic and supposedly live personages and getting nowhere except back to the  beginning.  At this point the walls nearest my head resembled a bombed out village in Iraq and I had to move my position many times to find a fresh wall to beat my head against.  I also was having difficulty hearing any directions that came to me from the phone due to the bells ringing inside my head.

I next tried to simply change my password.  None of the supposedly simple automated methods worked.   After waiting for 42 minutes to be allowed to speak to a live tech person in the correct department and hearing, "Hello, this is Janet" followed by the dial tone, I gave up this fruitless self torture and hied me to the nearest Walmart to try to purchase a new, uncomplicated cell phone.  That, my dears, may be the 2nd most difficult thing in the world to achieve next to World Peace.  After several hours I finally settled for one which has a camera but no keyboard and staggered home a bloody and totally beaten human specimen.  Which brings you up to date on where I was when I began this post and pretty much where I have  been while NOT blogging lately..

 During the 24 hours since the above carnage the bells in my brain have quieted and I have been slowly attempting to subjugate myself to this new infernal machine, but I must confess, progress is slow and I am not sure if I will ever  be completely whole again.  However, I am thrilled to report that at least I can remember my new cell phone number.........or is that the one I had before the last one....?  Sob.........


  1. Wait- did I write this?
    No. But I sure could have.
    The world is hurtling on and I am standing on the corner going, "What? What? What?"

  2. Never understood why they dont make bigger easy use phones for the slightly older, and bigger pockets and bags to keep them in.

  3. Oh good, my demands worked! :-) I'm sorry about all the stupid phone hassles. It's all just material, eh?

  4. I don't have one. Zennnnnnnnnn, hmmmmmmmmm.oooommmm.

  5. You qualify for life in France, being already trained...

  6. I join you in objecting to the tiny numbers and letters on the gadgets. I have a cell phone but don't use it. Have lovely land phone and carry cell phone when I go out, for possible emergencies. Glad to learn I am not the only older person that hates these tiny gadgets.
    Enjoy reading your blog. Please keep doing it.

  7. The older I get the harder it is to see the damn numbers. Seriously...what about us? the Aging population? Laughing out loud.

  8. Ha! The password boogieman! He gets us all every now and then. I thought I had developed a perfect way to foil him, but then I would encounter a website that would not allow enough characters. Or wouldn't allow "special" characters. If only they could all get their act together and standardize this thing. But then... that might defeat the purpose, mightn't it?

    Glad to see you back, Lo. I, however, am suffering the same fate - or whatever - as you. I find I just need to back up and rest. Also, I often feel the world is not interested in anything I have to say anyway, so why bother?

    But every now and then I do. Like today. How long will it be before I post again? Not even *I* know that. :)

  9. Good to see you back! Its not good to see your poor bruised head, the shattered drywall (or is it plaster?) and the calluses the long waits on the phone have given your ear.

    I'm going to bet that the next phone you get will have all the bells and whistles now available and much more - so much more that people like you and me will be returned to the (19)20's and party lines complete with wires.

  10. Lovely to see you back in blog land, even though you have had a few hassles along the way. I'm a bit of a luddite when it comes to smart phones and the like. What's wrong with having a phone that you use to call people?!

  11. LOL! Why I don't own an iPhone, reason # 73954...

    Lovely to have you back ~

  12. Sorry to be laughing so hard at your misfortune. A few weeks after I was unable to turn on our mobile phone to make a call (it really was rather urgent), an autistic ADHD 6-year-old boy walked up to my husband and asked to see our mobile, and he gave it to him and he had it turned on in 5 seconds. I could have cried.

  13. Good to hear from you!

    I remember my parents complaining about the small print in the newspaper and phone book, or the small numbers on the remote control to the tv when we finally got one. Now I'm the one complaining, so you have my sympathy.

  14. Alert! You probably have 14 days to exchange that phone for one that has a keyboard, which will eliminate the texting speed problem of course and get, at least, your contacts entered without so much fuss. Take advantage of the 14 day grace and swap it out. You dont need a "smart" phone, just a good texting phone. I could make a career out of accompanying people to the electronics store and keeping them out of trouble ... but they won't pay for it! LOL.

    I sympathize with your ATT experience. Don't ask me how I know so much ... it's a longer story than the one you just told.

    Poor baby!

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